Combo #6 Was a Big Hit Tonight

It's commonly thought that routine is good for kids. It creates stability and comfort, giving them security in knowing what to expect. We seem to be King and Queen of routine. Oh, not about naptime. Or bedtime. Or, well, most of the other "scheduled" parts of the day. Of course, weekday mornings require routine to get to work and school on time. Those kiddos now understand that when I need to go or I'll miss the bus, they had better let me go. This is less from an understanding of professional work ethic, as from a deeply rooted sense of awe of any bus, train or plane. Missing the bus is worse than time out in their eyes. Weekends include housework, playing outside, visiting with friends, they now include soccer (a whole other post!), and grocery shopping for the week. And Starbucks. However, there is often one day most weeks when making dinner just isn't feasible. Maybe the chicken expired in the fridge earlier than I expected. Maybe (hypothetically speaking of course) I got on the wrong bus and had to call Fillip to say I was all the way across the valley, and getting on another bus heading back, but please come pick me up at this alternate stop. Hypothetically, this wrong bus had the right number for those of you who might suggest reading that hypothetical sign.

So, about once every week or two we go to our favorite place. It's a little Mexican restaurant that has cheap, plentiful and delicious food. Seriously, going out to dinner is synonymous with going there. We rarely deviate because the reason we are going out to begin with always involves simplifying the evening, and therefore does not include a decision about where to go. The kids love it and rarely leave anything on their plates. They always get the kids mini-burritos usually with rice and beans. They are pretty good about trying new things, but hadn't yet ventured into another item. I had never paid attention to the fact that Fillip always orders their dinners by combo number, rather than name. Tonight was one of those nights when dinner at home wasn't the best option.

On the way over to the restaurant, before we had even discussed our dinner choice, we heard a little Logan voice say "I don't want combo #3." Maybe we need a little less routine.

Oh, and for the record, he ordered and enchilada instead of his burritos, ate the whole thing, and the enchilada from Fillip's plate. Hayden downed both burritos as quickly as any industrial vacuum. That's what we like about our routine.

Oh yeah...that blog thing I do

No, I didn't fall in a black hole. Aliens didn't abduct me, nor have I decided to circumnavigate the globe on a hot air balloon, rendering myself legitimately unable to update my blog. I've just been way too distracted by the little day to day things to gather any thoughts to share here. Often, something silly will happen and I make a mental note that it would be a great blog entry. Unfortunately, my mental noteboard seems to be one of those dry erase boards that is constantly smudging the pertinent info away. So, a little tidbit.

Lately, saying bedtime is a challenge is a gross understatement. Bedtime is a nightmare. As soon as we announce that it is time to get ready for bed, everyone braces for battle and It Is On! After weeks of too much yelling, too much crying, and an elevated stress level that nobody enjoying an extended time off work should experience, I decided enough is enough. Obviously, our approach was not working. So, I made a sticker chart and we tried it out. Each night the boys would go to bed nicely, they earned a fabulous Dinosaur Sticker in the morning. After 3 stickers in a row, they earned a Special Treat. The Special Treat turned out to be donuts, and I am am not happy to share that the donut shop around the corner has delicious, light, fluffy donuts filled with blueberry goodness the likes of which I haven't experienced since my childhood. I would love to tell you of the miraculous results of this sticker chart, how bedtime immediately turned around and we are once again nominated for Parents of the Year awards. However, the results have been spotty.

The most positive outcome seems to be that with a specific recourse, I am much calmer no matter how bedtime goes most nights. Hayden has thrived on this system, enjoying the positive rewards he earns consistently. He is generally great about going to bed, so this was not a big challenge for him. It has been nice to give him these rewards because he is constantly testing us in other ways, so currently gets significant negative feedback. Giving him an opportunity to "win" has been great, and I think it has carried over to other areas. It also gives Logan a tangible example to follow, as it sucks to watch your brother get a treat when you didn't earn one yourself.

Logan has definitely improved on this system. He understands the rewards coming to him, and knows to ask for his sticker the next morning if he was good at bedtime. His sticker chart isn't nearly as full as Hayden's but I have to think any progress is good. On nights when he is completely uncooperative, he screams at us that "I no wan a tikkah. I no yike tikkahs!" However, the proud smile on his face when he gets those stickers tells me differently. Often, when Logan is yelling and carrying on instead of going to bed nicely, we have Hayden go to sleep in our bed, then move him later, which is a whole challenge in and of itself. It's not easy to get 40 pounds of sleeping arms and lets up onto that top bunk! I then tell Logan he can choose to either lay down quietly and go to sleep, or I will go out and shut the door. It's the same premise of letting a baby cry it out. Although I understand many people don't agree with doing that, I don't care to spend two hours every evening putting a yelling, screaming Logan to bed. This works. Five minutes of crying sure beats 2 hours. I have only needed to shut the door a couple times, and he would cry for a few minutes before laying down, pulling up the covers and waiting for me to come back to lay with him. Now, I just walk out and he calms right down.

Last night I thought that since things were going so well, I'd let Hayden stay in the room until Logan settled himself. Well, Logan wouldn't settle so I walked out and closed the door. I'm not sure I even made it across the hall before both boys were bouncing around giggling like the new playground had just opened in there. Frustrated, I told them no stickers in the morning, and moved Hayden to my bed. They were both asleep within 15 minutes after that. This morning, Logan asked about stickers so I explained why none were coming. Hayden tried to blame Logan, but I said he has a choice to react or not. Well, it was really hard not to cave and hand him a sticker when he calmly explained "Mommy, I was trying to lay there nicely and go to sleep but my brother was kept waking me up. He was making me smile, and when I smile the giggle just needs to come out." :)

Hi, my name is Marlo and...

Most weekend mornings one of us takes the kids to the Starbuck's drive-thru. They usually get the kids cocoa, which we let them call chocolate coffee. That sounds perfectly appropriate, but it is a bit surprising when they know our order so well. Hayden knows Fillip's particulars and my alternate drinks. Yesterday morning Fillip sent Hayden in for my order while I got to sleep in. It actually surprised me that he didn't repeat grande iced fat free caramel macchiato correctly. I mean, what's wrong with that kid? This morning we were working on the fact that whatever I order is fat free. Getting me full fat is a fireable offense. He is very aware of all our tastes and what we eat and drink. Now and then (ok, usually once a week) when we have a cocktail he asks to taste it. We always tell him no because it has alcohol in it. Well, maybe that is too much information.

Tonight he was playing on his toy phone placing our order. This happens often, and they frequently pretend they are on their way to Starbucks. As I was getting Logan in his jammies, Hayden was busy ordering for us: "Hi, I need to get one warm chocolate coffee. Yeah, for me. And a strawberry cold drink for my brother. He likes that. Yeah. Cafe Americano for my Daddy with an add shot. Uh huh. Oh nuffing.(Must have been offered a pastry at this point.) But also, a grande vanilla latte for my Mommy. That one needs alcohol in it." Do you see the problem here? I'm sure it's obvious to you as well. He forgot the fat free. Otherwise, it sounds perfect.

I Have a Newfound Respect for My Grandma.

My Grandma used to play endless board games with me. Bedtime was not an issue when the Master of the Game was being determined. The game we played the most by far was Aggravation. She was great about teaching me strategy and good sportsmanship. Cheering each other on was essential. However, there was a flip side to that. She was ruthless! She would bump off my marble with a little shout of glee, and expected the same of me given an opportunity to keep her from bringing that marble "Home." Playful pouting was fine, but no sulking allowed. We could gloat, but we could not get mad. The first loser would call out "two out of three!" in order to get the tournament going. I can remember my Grandpa dozing on the recliner chair nearby, giving us a sleepy indulgent smile at midnight as he would hear shouts of "seven out of ten!" There were several other games too like rummy tile (which I don't think I have ever won), and Hi Ho Cherry Oh.

For Chanukah this year, Hayden was given Hi Ho Cherry Oh. He and I have played Candyland, and recently War, but he hadn't yet seen this childhood favorite of mine. Last night I thought it would be great fun to bring Logan into the world of games as well. What I did not realize is how difficult it is to set up the game. Those cherries are so tiny, and it was taking me forever to get all 40 of them on the trees. Each time I would get about halfway there, Logan would accidentally bump the board, sending them all flying. After about half a dozen times, I was getting pretty frustrated. We would start to play then- Blam! At one point we were pretty well into an actual game. Hayden was being a great sport each time his spinner landed on a dog or a bird (put 2 cherries back!) or dumped his bucket completely. Logan was doing pretty well understanding how to play. He had a surprisingly good spin on the spinner and counted along as we put cherries in his bucket or back on the tree. When I would spin a bird or a dog they would both shout "Hey Birdie!! Hey Doggie!!" It was really cute. The first game was only a couple rounds, as I somehow got lucky on each spin. Next, Hayden won a round where Logan was off distracted by something else. We set up again, as there had been no clear winner, and Logan wanted to play. Again, that little foot bumped the board halfway through the game eliciting my frustrated cry of "Logan!!" and thoughts that I should just put the whole thing away. He responded with a very sweet "Sawwy, Mommy. It was a attident. I won do it adain."

Awww, shucks. Two out of three then!

This is a little gross

Logan is consistently pooping on the potty these days, usually during dinner. He is really great about it, even in a restaurant. One night he had to go at a coffeee shop so I scooped him out of his high chair and off he went to the bathroom, letting everyone on the way know "I go poop in potty!!" Fortunately, it is a family restaurant and I didn't notice anyone looking absolutely appalled. Mostly they smiled encouragingly and wished him luck, then high fived him on the way back. Sometimes I need to step back and realize that potty training brings all new experiences to him. In addition to anticipating when he needs to go, then holding it for a few minutes, he needs to learn to sit properly, feel comfortable and is experiencing all new sensations....and sounds. One of the first times he was sitting up there so proudly, getting the positive results we want, we heard the little splash.

Logan, looking extremely proud of himself -"Did you hear that?"

Me- "Yes."

Logan- "Dat came out my butt."

Okay...time to sit back down for dinner!

How I get through the day

Early morning I went into Hayden's room to give him a snuggle and kiss him before leaving for work. As I put my arms around him, a distinctive noise rumbled under the covers. Because he is a 3 year old boy, he started giggling uncontrollably. "Heh heh...'scuse me....heh heh heh...That was...heh heh..heh...hehh... YOU!!!" Then he wasn't the only one giggling. Little bugger has already learned to hot box the bed then blame the other person!

Two of my girlfriends gave birth on Saturday. Congratulations to both families! Yesterday I got to visit my best friend's new nephew. I was telling Hayden about it, saying I got to meet his friend's new baby brother.
Hayden - "His new baby brother?"
Me - "Yes."
Hayden - "But, how did his other one break?"


Hayden - "Mommy, why are you putting on makeup?"
Me - "Because I like the way I look better."
Hayden - "But, you are already pretty the way you are. You don't need any makeup."
Does it get any better than that?

We just aren't chicken nugget people

At 19 months, Logan seems to have reached peak cuteness. I know I keep saying that about each of them, but each age brings it's own challenges and charm. As challenging as Logan can be, he is unbelievably charming every day. Sometimes Hayden is his best straight man.

Last night I made a dinner that most wouldn't consider to be so kid-friendly. Mind you, I did make mac n' cheese as a backup, but didn't let the kids know about that. I prefer to let them think they have no options other than eat what I made or go to bed hungry. They have yet to go to bed hungry. However, since Hayden has professed to dislike both asparagus and shrimp, I figured the shrimp and asparagus pasta might be asking too much. As always, he surprised me, tasted everything, and decided he likes shrimp after all. Logan previously demonstrated that shrimp are better than life itself, demanding "mo!" again and again. He is a purist and likes them unadulterated by any type of breading. He will methodically peel off any breading to get to the delicious delicacy within. This has greatly amused my friends on more than one occasion. Obviously, the secret mac n' cheese was not intended for this little guy. In addition to the shrimp and asparagus pasta we also had king crab legs. Mmmm! Both kids gladly tried this new pink and interesting food. Hayden gave it good reviews, gladly having more. Logan demanded we keep it coming without delay. We couldn't crack it fast enough, and didn't even realize we were each giving it to him, still not keeping up. Now, I can see a baby going wild over candy, icecream or even some sweet fruit. I had not anticipated that shellfish would get him going. At one point, Fillip thought he wanted more shrimp and popped a piece into his mouth. It took us a minute to realize that the spontaneous sobs and fat rolling tears were his disappointment that this bite was not crab. Ok, sheesh!!

Toward the end of dinner, Hayden let out a huge belch. Since we have two little boys, it isn't surprising that this induced fits of giggles on both sides of the table. And, whatever one boy thinks is funny will be sure to amuse the other, making their giggles self perpetuating. Fillip and I both sat there trying to keep a straight face and asking Hayden "what do you say?" We are big on please, thank you and excuse me. As we sat there being total hard asses, serious as we could be over this breach in decorum, Logan looks at Hayden with as much attitude as any hormonal adolescent would muster and says " 'scuse you!"

So much for decorum.

Sometimes the smallest victories are the greatest.

Sometimes "people" can be grumpy. Often for no particular reason, at least that the rest of us can figure out. Yesterday, was one of those days. Fillip just seemed to have woken up on the wrong side of the bed...all day.

After several weeks of being non-stop busy, we wanted to do something fun with the kids, so went over to Travel Town where both boys were absolutely delighted by the trains. The weather was nice enough, Hayden got "green soda" (7-Up) and Logan was insistent on that bag of Ruffles chips way up there. He was absolutely determined to run back to the hot dog cart vendor to get those chips, not that he's ever seen them in our house. We took a ride on the train where the kids alternately yelled "All aboooaarrd!!" and "Choo chooo!" around the entire park. Logan's eyes were the size of saucers the whole time as he exclaimed in wonder.

Prior to leaving, we had insisted on naptime. Logan goes down like he is relieved to finally get a break from his rough schedule, and Hayden acts as if we are telling him to spend an hour in a pot of acid. Fillip finally got Hayden to sleep, but for various reasons that sleep was brief. I was slightly concerned that he would melt down early, but both boys were great. On the way home, Fillip wasn't quite a ray of sunshine. I was trying to just ignore it and not make a scene in front of the kids, trying to quietly deflect the tension. All of a sudden, Hayden pipes up from the backseat "Daddy, maybe you need a nap."

Indeed.