Happy 4th Birthday, Logan.

What can I say about this guy?

He is a wiry little bundle of energy, always on the go. He is silly, creative, hysterically funny and so endearing with those bright blue eyes and endlessly expressive face. He is the most stubborn one among us, yet I suspect his sense of goodness and compassion run equally deep. He will try any food offered and rarely dislikes any of it. His lack of g's and k's remains sweetly him. He loves to help with housework, yardwork, cooking and breaking things. He is the shadowy figure of my pre-dawn dreams, wandering in for a morning "snuddle." He is a child who will seek physical contact at any given time, even if that simply means quietly brushing his little fingers across the inside of my hand as we shop for groceries. He is a boy who this week helped his friend's "baby sister" feel comfortable as she began preschool at his school, choosing to sit by her side, protectively watching her nap while his friends went to play. He is heartbroken that his brother is moving on to a new school, yet elated that he has moved into the big boy Purple Room at long last. He giggles in his sleep. He is the one who will ask if someone is ok, when something is not, give kisses when you need them least and most, and make a grand show of throwing all his Candyland cards in the air in a dramatic fit of temper upon losing the game, replete with stomping, throwing himself on his bed and sobbing pathetically. He is a shining light of happiness in our world.

Happy birthday, my irresistable Logan.

Cherry Blossoms

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, MOM.

I HOPE YOUR WHOLE DAY WAS THIS LOVELY.

Last summer, I had the good fortune of being unemployed, with plenty of spare time to go walking at the nearby lake. As the beautiful cherry blossoms bloomed throughout the park, I kept thinking that I needed to bring my camera and get some pictures of the kids. Well, I put it off so long that I didn't get even one picture. Today, I remedied that. Fillip told me early in the day he was picking up some extra work and wouldn't be home for dinner. I decided the kids and I would ride/skate to the park for a picnic. On the way to pick them up I stopped at the grocery store to grab some corned beef, peppered turkey, various cheese, some grapes and bottled water. We got home, got our gear and headed out- the boys on bikes and me with a balance-altering backpack.

It was a little tricky keeping my balance on skates (yes, quads..anyone who knows me knows it is Old School all the way when it comes to my skates) with a backpack filled with a sheet to sit on, dinner, and water all pulling this way and that every time I turned around to check on the mini cyclists behind me. Not to mention, trying to get all three of us quickly across a major street without anyone falling, stopping, and trying to convey that staying between the lines of the crosswalk is a much better idea than going diagonal across the intersection.

It was so peaceful and beautiful at the lake tonight. It really couldn't have been more perfect. The sunset was stunning, going from a soft amber and powder blue to brilliant fushia and orange. It seemed as if the sky wanted to make the sunset so spectacular that we would want today to never end for all its beauty. It was a relaxing dinner with the boys picking at the items I had brought, no pressure to finish a "meal" and me watching them eat more than anyone would ever expect. Hayden made an interesting comment at one point about a man we saw coming into the park in a wheelchair with his dog. The dog was in a bright yellow crossing guard vest, and the man was in a red velvet gown. Hayden passed him by and said "Sometimes as people get older, they really seem younger." He has no idea how true that can be. Such an old soul, that one.
As I tucked Logan in for bed, I got a quiet "tank you fowah taytind me on a pitnit, Mommy." (Read: Thank you for taking me on a picnic, Mommy.) Oh, we will definitely be doing this again.

Hayden's Pirate Party in Pictures

Hayden had quite a birthday party. He wanted a pirate theme, and we went all out. The kids got to do a treasure hunt, bust open a pinata, have some cake, and have more candy than any parent will ever forgive us for. They walked away with bags full of booty that included swords, eye patches, compasses, tattoos, stickers, jewelry, coins, and a bunch of other really cheap stuff from my favorite party supply website. Although our timing was off, Hayden and the other kids seemed to have a fantastic time. Momma and Papa pirate were absolutely beat by the end.

Argghhh Matey! Captain Hayden keeps the guests in line.
Who doesn't have a friend paint an awesome mural in the backyard the night before a party?And builds a ship.... I just like this picture.
Walking the plank.


The birthday boy on a treasure hunt.
Pillaging and plundering after the treasure hunt.
This is a picture of the kids with the pinatas a couple days before the party, but it gives you an idea of how freakin' huge they were.

The cake

I think they got enough candy.......even if they had to scuffle over it.


Finally, present time! It's fun when your big brother gets a new guitar!
Tired Mom and Dad.
Tired and ready for bed- nothing like beginning a new story when you get Charlotte's Web for your birthday. Oh, and those glasses have got to go. I look like I turned twice my age.

Happy birthday, Captain Hayden.

Hayden's 5th Birthday

What I can I say about my sweet Hayden? He is such a precious kid. He has a sensitive soul, and truly wants to make others feel good. He is generous with compliments, and most of the time willing to consider other opinions. He has an amazing intelligence that even his teacher seems a bit surprised by. He is now reading and constantly sounding out words wherever we are. He makes "good" mistakes, in that he is thinking about the phonic rules he knows, and applies them. It's not his fault English is quirky. He also does arithmetic, applying simple addition and subtraction to more abstract situations than his school worksheets. He seems to enjoy academic work more than anything, and talks about that much more than playtime at school. He absolutely adores his teacher, and I am wondering how he will do transitioning to the next class this month.

Yesterday was his very first T-ball game. It was so cute! He seemed to really enjoy himself, and like soccer, is eager to listen to the coaches and take their suggestions. He does tend to lose focus frequently, but we are hoping team sports will help him with that. One thing Fillip noticed during the game, is that Hayden was constantly watching for where Logan was. Those two are so connected and they need to know what the other one is doing at all times. It is sweet, although we need to let him know we've got Logan covered. Keep your eye on the ball, kid.

At home Hayden waffles between petulant child, and old soul. He is certainly charming, and very affectionate. Typically, he will be very helpful even without being asked. However, when he is tired or just not in the mood, he acts like a resentful teenager, put out at having to contribute in any way. Fortunately, it isn't the majority of the time. Often, Hayden's helpfulness is hampered by Logan's "little brother-ness." It's hard to make your bed when your little brother has his butt in your face. (Yes, we are working on that.)

Hayden retains his analytical and mechanical tendencies, which are offset by Logan's creativity. They want to be together all the time, even when they are driving each other crazy. Hayden wants to be in charge of Logan at all times, correcting his pronunciation, enforcing rules, and being "the leader." Unfortunately for Hayden, Logan doesn't always appreciate these efforts, and they tend to scuffle when Logan exerts his independence. Over the last couple months, they have been getting along well, and rarely do more than a little squabbling.He love to be silly, making up words and changing lyrics to songs. He has come up with some intensely irritating noices, and takes great joy in doing them over and over again.

Hayden tends to be quite emotionally sensitive with his own emotions, and in reading ours. He gets his feelings easily hurt, or gets very angry when he feels things are unfair. However, he also tells us he loves us, laughs easily, and is pretty good about clarifying when he isn't sure if we are mad. It often looks like he is absorbing his emotions, not bringing them to our attention when he is worried about something. However, he is able to express himself quite well when we talk together, and realizes he can express whatever is bothering him. He remembers every little detail, often amazing people with the trivial facts he will come up with months after seeing someone. Getting in trouble is a big deal to him, and he is generally really good. When he does get time out, he is truly outraged, but it is very easy to get a point across with him. He learns rules well, and generally doesn't try to break them. Sometimes, though, he does forget what they are.

He loves to snuggle when he goes to bed, and have a quiet chat before falling asleep. I love to snuggle him back, and remind him of how very much he is loved. He is a true joy every day.

When mechanical tendencies and creativity collide

Morning Jammie Jam

We aren't exactly morning people. Logan is. Therefore, Hayden (kinda) is. Now that the kids are older, we are more lax on getting up weekend mornings. Really, there are plenty of healthy snacks they can get, two rooms full of fun toys they are allowed to play with, and they know where to find us if they need their butt wiped. We tend to get up every 20-30 minutes from 6am-8:30am making sure they are fine, aren't beating each other up, and not flooding the bathroom under the guise of watering the plant. (Think quick- how long does it take a 2 year old to flood the bathroom? Less time than it takes to think of an answer! Just turn the faucet slightly over the sink counter, and put it on full blast. Ask me how I know that...)

A couple weeks ago I was quite surprised at what I found them doing, or rather where I found them. When I first got up to say good morning, I didn't see them. Then, I heard giggles and heard them call out to me. I looked up, and saw two grinning faces in the cabinets ABOVE their closet. They had moved the bunk ladder to the tall chest of drawers. The chest stands in front of the closet. With that set up it was easy to build a little nest of pillows, blankets, stuffed animals and toys up by the ceiling in the cubbies. What really amuses me is that since Fillip said they were allowed to do that, they haven't done it since. He took all the fun out of it, I guess.

However, it seems that those bins of toys, games, puzzles, books and a room full of off limits electronics like a tv, computer, etc.. just doesn't cut it. Saturday morning they decided to play Swimming Pool. This is how it went- they took their mattress off the bed, stripped the sheets off and made that the pool. They would jump from the actual bed to the mattress on the floor to go "swimming." I just have to assume they were jumping only from the bottom bunk, not doing an Olympic high dive event from the top, but honestly I didn't ask.

See, there was a second element to the game. They know that a pool needs a fence with a gate. A locking gate that must be unlocked to go swimming. So far, it sounds like a little harmless mischief with a well embedded focus on safety, right? Well, not so much. The way they would "unlock" the "pool gate" was to remove a screw from the bunk bed frame. Again, and again, and again.... Hayden somehow knew which of the three different allen wrenches to grab from the counter. Logan just grabbed a sharp knife to use as a wrench, which I didn't know was in the drawer. (He knew because he had spotted it a few days earlier helping Hayden set the table. Again...good values gone terribly wrong!) Anyway, when Fillip went into their room about 20 minutes after I had gone in, the bunk beds were listing to the side, with just one central screw barely holding it together.

I'm not sure the swimming lessons we signed up for will help here.

How could these two do anything wrong?

Indelible

After a very soggy day (not the weather outside, just the effects of a head cold and my emotions) I think that I have indelibly engraved the momentous occasion of the inauguration on the memory of everyone in this house.

I watched the swearing in and President Obama's (joy!) speech live on the internet from my desk. Although I was obligated to be there, I truly wished I was home on the couch watching such a significant, wonderful moment with Fillip and the kids. I read the speech again and again, getting teary each time. Because the sound quality on my desk was terrible, and people did interrupt me, I didn't initially hear the impact of President Obama's (joy!) delivery. On my way to pick up the kids, I got misty all over again hearing the speech rebroadcast on NPR.

As I walked into the school, I told the boys to quickly grab their stuff because President Obama's :) speech was on and I wanted them to hear it. They excitedly told me that they saw him on tv today! in the purple room! all three classes were there and he is our new President! I fell in love with the school all over again for this. Nonetheless, I still hurried them out to the car to hear the end of the speech, arriving home with tears streaming down my face with happiness at what our country has achieved by electing this particular man, and hope for what good things are to come by having collectively made this choice.

Before bedtime, I had the kids watch the swearing in again so I could instill in them once more how important that moment was, and share the feeling of hope that I have for the years to come. They were so excited to say that they saw that same thing today! Then, they were especially interested to know where the President lives and that he has two daughters. They now want to go there to meet the whole family, and were duely impressed by the pictures I took myself of that grand house when I was ten years old.

My childhood is peppered with fleeting memories of such significant moments, such as the day President Reagan was elected, and the tragedy of the Challenger Shuttle. They may not remember everything they saw today, will understand the significance even less, but hopefully they do remember the feeling of anticipation, joy and importance of welcoming our new President.

Just popping in for a minute...

Oh, hello there! Are you still here? How nice of you to stay!

Obviously, with weeks of e-silence on my blog, I've been occupied with other things. I could go on and on about busy holidays, rushed last minute shopping, haggling with downtown wholesale vendors, and eating delicious bacon wrapped hotdogs from a streetcart with the money I saved haggling. However, I just don't have it in me to wax poetically these days. Suffice it to say - holidays were good. Glad to get back to routine. So, I am here for just a moment to relate one tidbit.

HAYDEN CAN RIDE A BIKE!

We took his training wheels off yesterday and he took off like he's been riding independently for years. Getting started from a stopped position is a challenge, but he definitely has the balance once he gets started. Although Filllip and I have discussed at length where each of the kids' characteristics come from, I can say definitively- he gets this from his Dad.

I'm so proud of my little boy!!!

Me Time

Despite the old cliche, I love walking here in L.A. It is something that I find very rewarding and need to be mindful to make time for more often. We got our first rainy day of the season this weekend. I absolutely love rain, and took several opportunities to enjoy the weather. At one point, I found myself in the midst of several things at once,trying to jam pack my weekend with productivity and socializing, which is nothing unusual. I realized I had limited time to go for a good walk. Often, I take the kids on bikes and find myself slowly making our way around the block, arriving home a bit frustrated at our lack of umphh. This time, I decided to take some MeTime, a rare and under utilized treat.

I headed out in the drizzle for the lake. Initially, I felt stiff, doubtful that walking in cool, damp weather was such a great idea. Having to ford gutter rivers of rainwash impeded my pace, causing my enthusiasm to wane a bit. However, this Pisces is forever drawn to water, and I just felt a need to get to the lake. As I crossed into the park I felt much better, eagerly anticipating my destination. Although there were plenty of people there, there weren't nearly the crowds we usually find. For once, I headed to a bench and consciously took a seat to absorb the zen of the water.

As I sat looking at the pewter expanse, I became aware of my senses taking turns influencing my experience. I started to notice finer details about the scene before me. The grass was exceptionally green in contrast to the grey sky, and neutral plumed birds. The water had a gentle ripple, with mostly ducks floating about. As I looked around, the coots (my favorite bird there) seemed to be a single unit of feeding black, but the longer I watched, the more individual birds began to stand out. At first they seemed one blob of bobbing feeding heads, but really they were all at a different pace, some challening others, and some just hanging out on the perimeter. As I watched, I noticed I was hearing more than I was seeing. Those coots don't eat silently, but with a soft persistant pittering as their agile white beaks plucked blades of grass and insects from the ground. It was almost like the earlier whisper of rain. After a few minutes of concerted relaxation at the water, I headed back home at a brisk pace. I noticed a great difference in how I felt. Initially, I had felt stiff and slow,annoyed by my wet feet, burdened by the stress of numerous trivial responsibilities.

Once I headed back home, I could feel that my body posture was straighter, more open. My gait was swift with my hips and shoulders swinging freely with every step. My mind had shed the earlier stress and I felt like I was greeting each new step with a happy, positive thought. Often, I try to spend as much time with the kids to compensate for my time at work all week. I do an amazing job piling on the guilt for wanting a few minutes to myself, for leaving it all to Fillip for my own selfish wants. But, you know what? I truly feel that the refreshed wife and mom who returned to our house from the lake was so much more valuable than the stressed out lady that had left. Maybe I should feel guilty for not finding that inner peace more often. What a difference a walk makes.

Amber Waves of Granite and Steel

So, again, I've joined a gym. Generally, I join a gym that is conveniently located either on my way to, or near work, and am pretty good about exercising regularly once I've established a routine. So, I cancelled my membership at the first gym after we bought this house because I had to backtrack 20 minutes each way to get to the gym before work. With Los Angeles traffic being what it is, I had no desire to add another 40 minutes drive time to my day. The second time, the gym was near my office. Well, getting laid off put a crimp in that plan. Which brings me to Lucky Gym #3. I really have no excuse at this point, as this is located in the next building from my office, my company subsidises half of the monthly dues, and will reimburse me up to $400 per year for whatever I lay out for "health and wellness." Sweet deal, eh? At the beginning of the month I headed over to the gym on my lunch break with all confidence that this fitness program would endure. I took the obligatory tour, awkwardly, yet briefly walked through the locker room feeling like a voyeur, and spent the rest of my lunch break perusing the literature and imagining all the group classes I would be taking. About a week later I signed up. Today, I finally worked out- sorta.

Typically I catch a bus at 6:45am, getting me to my office by 7:30am. I thought I would just take a 5am bus and have plenty of time to walk the extra distance, workout for about an hour, then shower and doll up for my coworkers. When I looked at the bus schedule last night, I realized it doesn't pick up at my stop earlier than 6:30am. Shoot. Along with my health and wellness benefit, my company also sponsers a Rideshare program. So long as we take public transportation at least 60% of the time, they pay for all or most of the fare, and validate parking on the days we do drive in. Due to the recent holidays and Fillip being out of town, I had to drive a couple extra days already. So, I figured I would just drive across the valley to the subway, ride the rails for about half an hour, take a quick jaunt up the hill to the gym, and have plenty of time.

With good intentions I left the house before 5:30am, and grossly underestimated my time and the effort involved. After driving nearly 30 minutes, finding a spot at the back of the subway lot, running down the endless stairs and through the station to jump on the subway, then waiting for it to go back in service- after all that I thought I was good to go. Except I didn't actually get downtown until 6:30am, and somehow exited the station on the wrong side, leaving me further from the gym than I expected to be. Then, I had to trudge up the hill, in the predawn dark (with all sorts of unsavory characters skulking around) with my purse and a backpack that I swear someone must have hidden rocks in. By the time I got my sweaty self to the gym I had 40 minutes total to workout, shower and get ready for work. Let me tell you, I'm not all that low maintenance. I quickly threw my baggage in a locker and hopped on a treadmill to watch dawn break over Bunker Hill. As the sun slowly came up over the horizon, it infused all the buildings in a soft amber light, slowly brightening as if someone were gradually adjusting a dimmer switch to the city. As I watched the sun illuminate the panorama of glass, granite and steel before me, feeling the quick burn of the treadmill, I thought to myself-

This is totally not worth it.

Combo #6 Was a Big Hit Tonight

It's commonly thought that routine is good for kids. It creates stability and comfort, giving them security in knowing what to expect. We seem to be King and Queen of routine. Oh, not about naptime. Or bedtime. Or, well, most of the other "scheduled" parts of the day. Of course, weekday mornings require routine to get to work and school on time. Those kiddos now understand that when I need to go or I'll miss the bus, they had better let me go. This is less from an understanding of professional work ethic, as from a deeply rooted sense of awe of any bus, train or plane. Missing the bus is worse than time out in their eyes. Weekends include housework, playing outside, visiting with friends, they now include soccer (a whole other post!), and grocery shopping for the week. And Starbucks. However, there is often one day most weeks when making dinner just isn't feasible. Maybe the chicken expired in the fridge earlier than I expected. Maybe (hypothetically speaking of course) I got on the wrong bus and had to call Fillip to say I was all the way across the valley, and getting on another bus heading back, but please come pick me up at this alternate stop. Hypothetically, this wrong bus had the right number for those of you who might suggest reading that hypothetical sign.

So, about once every week or two we go to our favorite place. It's a little Mexican restaurant that has cheap, plentiful and delicious food. Seriously, going out to dinner is synonymous with going there. We rarely deviate because the reason we are going out to begin with always involves simplifying the evening, and therefore does not include a decision about where to go. The kids love it and rarely leave anything on their plates. They always get the kids mini-burritos usually with rice and beans. They are pretty good about trying new things, but hadn't yet ventured into another item. I had never paid attention to the fact that Fillip always orders their dinners by combo number, rather than name. Tonight was one of those nights when dinner at home wasn't the best option.

On the way over to the restaurant, before we had even discussed our dinner choice, we heard a little Logan voice say "I don't want combo #3." Maybe we need a little less routine.

Oh, and for the record, he ordered and enchilada instead of his burritos, ate the whole thing, and the enchilada from Fillip's plate. Hayden downed both burritos as quickly as any industrial vacuum. That's what we like about our routine.

Happy 3rd Birthday Logan!

Three years ago this morning, I smiled in relief at the fact that my second labor and delivery had gone so textbook smooth, and I was holding my sweet little Logan in my arms. Little did I know what a little spitfire I had there, and he keeps us on our toes every day with those intense emotions, and his silly comical personality.

This little boy is such an imp, and is fully aware of the power of those blue eyes. He is the most stubborn person in this house, which is saying a lot. He is also so tactile, loves to be physically close, manages to move his body in the most clumsy and agile ways, and because of his propensity for falling, bumping and bruising- seems to have a pretty high pain tolerance.

A couple months ago he decided he was done with diapers and tells everyone we encounter that he wears undahweah now. He has a most unique way of speaking, that only certain people can consistently understand because it is hard to translate speech that doesn't include r, k, c, l, g and a couple other consonants. Despite that, he has excellent sentence structure and vocabulary putting together long thoughts, sprinkled with the word poopy whenever he thinks he can get away with it.

He is so excited that today is his birthday, and has been greeting me for weeks in the morning with "is doday my buhday?" Well, today he didn't do that. When tucked him back in at 5:30am calling him my sweet birthday boy, his eyes lit up brighter than the predawn light.

Happy birthday to my sweet "Yodan."

We are fine, thank you

The boys are doing well. Hayden continues to thrive in preschool and is now learning to read. He says doing "paperwork" is his favorite part of the day, and he constantly asks his teacher for more work. She says she rarely gets a great student like him, and he is (almost) always a perfect angel for her. Before you think he is the greatest kid ever, let me tell you that with the other teachers at the school, he is more than challenging. He's got it into his head that he only has one teacher he needs to listen to. Life would be more pleasant during his afternoons if he would just believe everyone when we say he needs to be nice to ALL the teachers.

Logan is now potty trained which is fantastic. We have a very lackadaisical approach- meaning we don't do anything, and let the boys decide when they are ready. It's worked both times, and had them trained stress-free relatively early. For the first time in 4 1/2 years we aren't changing diapers!!! Whoo hoo!! Logan proudly drops trow wherever he is to show off his new Batman, Speedracer, Spiderman etc. underwear. We'll have to get him to stop eventually, but it's pretty funny right now.

It seems we have turned a bend on behavior. For awhile they were completely out of control, and bedtime was a 2 hour ordeal. Just when we would get one settled, the other would get crazy, and it would instantly become a 3-Ring circus. So, we started putting Logan to sleep in our room with a few minutes of snuggles before we leave the room. Instead of nagging him to sleep, cuddling him to sleep, holding him down when he gets up, or any other unpleasant and fruitless methods we were using, we now don't acknowledge him at all. If he does get up, we silently just put him back on the bed. Eventually, it isn't fun for him anymore and he just goes to sleep. He tries calling us, but we tell him we aren't going to answer, then just ignore it. If it goes on too long, we give him a warning then close the door. This method has had surprisingly quick results, and we are all much more relaxed. Hayden of course, gets put to bed with a brief snuggle, then he lays quietly until he falls asleep.

In addition to bedtime, we are using a quieter approach to discipline in general. One warning, then time out in the chair. Logan finally stays put most of the time. When he doesn't, I silently keep putting him back in the chair until he sits quietly for his full 2 minutes. Hayden is good about serving his 4 minute sentence, and we have broken his habit of stomping as loudly as he can into his room every time.

They seem to be getting along quite well these days, playing cooperatively and working as a team. They do squabble, but it is no longer constant. We have a lot of pretend play around here, and lots of drawing and writing. They also like to take there cardboard bricks to build anything they think of - a pool with spa, Starbucks drive-thru, a dog park... it's really one of my favorite things to find, despite the fact that it means I can't really walk through the room easily. I just love seeing their creativity and teamwork.

Fridays remain our fun day together. This week we went back to the Museum of Natural History by request. They were engrossed in my "tour" through the room of animal skeletons and seemed genuinely interested in the details I pointed out such as animal size, and smaller things like the proportion of rib length to leg length. Had that been me, I might have fallen asleep standing there, but they really listened and asked very well thought out questions. Last year, taking them out anywhere by myself was a huge ordeal. Now, they are truly a pleasure to bring them on one adventure after another. This week, maybe back to the beach!

Eleven Steps to Go

Ok, I'll admit it. I have a problem. That's the first step, right?

It started when my neighbor brought it over the first time. I couldn't be rude and refuse, so I had a little. At first, I thought that it was just a minor indulgence, a treat to get me through a rough spot. Once I finished what the neighbor had supplied, it was supposed to be over. Then Fillip gave me more. I found myself craving it, wanting it, sneaking it when nobody would know. Like a glass of wine with dinner I told myself it was just a little something to take the edge off. Unlike the occasional glass of wine, I am consuming all day long. Home alone I have a little after breakfast, tease myself that I need to wait an hour, or that I must have lunch first before going back for more. As soon as my healthy yogurt is finished, I find myself again taking a little before I am fully aware of what I am doing. Before I know it, it is all gone. Yet over the weekend, I bought more supplies, fully aware this time that I needed to just make a clean break.

It's not possible. Those damn Rice Krispy treats are addictive. Regular Krispies, Cocoa Krispies, or the new Cocoa/Nilla Krispies that look so mottled and pretty in the pan. It doesn't matter. I need that sweet gooey crunchy taste. Aaaahhh, there's my serenity.

Oh yeah...that blog thing I do

No, I didn't fall in a black hole. Aliens didn't abduct me, nor have I decided to circumnavigate the globe on a hot air balloon, rendering myself legitimately unable to update my blog. I've just been way too distracted by the little day to day things to gather any thoughts to share here. Often, something silly will happen and I make a mental note that it would be a great blog entry. Unfortunately, my mental noteboard seems to be one of those dry erase boards that is constantly smudging the pertinent info away. So, a little tidbit.

Lately, saying bedtime is a challenge is a gross understatement. Bedtime is a nightmare. As soon as we announce that it is time to get ready for bed, everyone braces for battle and It Is On! After weeks of too much yelling, too much crying, and an elevated stress level that nobody enjoying an extended time off work should experience, I decided enough is enough. Obviously, our approach was not working. So, I made a sticker chart and we tried it out. Each night the boys would go to bed nicely, they earned a fabulous Dinosaur Sticker in the morning. After 3 stickers in a row, they earned a Special Treat. The Special Treat turned out to be donuts, and I am am not happy to share that the donut shop around the corner has delicious, light, fluffy donuts filled with blueberry goodness the likes of which I haven't experienced since my childhood. I would love to tell you of the miraculous results of this sticker chart, how bedtime immediately turned around and we are once again nominated for Parents of the Year awards. However, the results have been spotty.

The most positive outcome seems to be that with a specific recourse, I am much calmer no matter how bedtime goes most nights. Hayden has thrived on this system, enjoying the positive rewards he earns consistently. He is generally great about going to bed, so this was not a big challenge for him. It has been nice to give him these rewards because he is constantly testing us in other ways, so currently gets significant negative feedback. Giving him an opportunity to "win" has been great, and I think it has carried over to other areas. It also gives Logan a tangible example to follow, as it sucks to watch your brother get a treat when you didn't earn one yourself.

Logan has definitely improved on this system. He understands the rewards coming to him, and knows to ask for his sticker the next morning if he was good at bedtime. His sticker chart isn't nearly as full as Hayden's but I have to think any progress is good. On nights when he is completely uncooperative, he screams at us that "I no wan a tikkah. I no yike tikkahs!" However, the proud smile on his face when he gets those stickers tells me differently. Often, when Logan is yelling and carrying on instead of going to bed nicely, we have Hayden go to sleep in our bed, then move him later, which is a whole challenge in and of itself. It's not easy to get 40 pounds of sleeping arms and lets up onto that top bunk! I then tell Logan he can choose to either lay down quietly and go to sleep, or I will go out and shut the door. It's the same premise of letting a baby cry it out. Although I understand many people don't agree with doing that, I don't care to spend two hours every evening putting a yelling, screaming Logan to bed. This works. Five minutes of crying sure beats 2 hours. I have only needed to shut the door a couple times, and he would cry for a few minutes before laying down, pulling up the covers and waiting for me to come back to lay with him. Now, I just walk out and he calms right down.

Last night I thought that since things were going so well, I'd let Hayden stay in the room until Logan settled himself. Well, Logan wouldn't settle so I walked out and closed the door. I'm not sure I even made it across the hall before both boys were bouncing around giggling like the new playground had just opened in there. Frustrated, I told them no stickers in the morning, and moved Hayden to my bed. They were both asleep within 15 minutes after that. This morning, Logan asked about stickers so I explained why none were coming. Hayden tried to blame Logan, but I said he has a choice to react or not. Well, it was really hard not to cave and hand him a sticker when he calmly explained "Mommy, I was trying to lay there nicely and go to sleep but my brother was kept waking me up. He was making me smile, and when I smile the giggle just needs to come out." :)

What the heck am I doing all day?

It's amazing how busy I seem to be now that I am not working. How could I possibly have time for a job? During the day I busily putter around the house making beds, wiping counters, doing laundry, or any other mundane tasks that catch my attention. On Fridays when the kids are home from school and on newly free weekends (since I get all the chores and errands done during the week), we do outings. This month we have gone to the beach, Travel Town, The Museum of Natural History, Noah's Ark at the Skirball Museum, and the Strawberry Festival. Not to mention, spent lots of time with family and friends.

I've nearly cleared the back patio of the mountain of boxes that remained unpacked over the last year. That has definitely been slow going as I need to find a specific place for everything, and can only continue until the sneezing starts. For any of you who don't know this, I HATE sneezing. It is as if my body has decided to interrupt whatever I am doing without the courtesy of even saying "excuse me." Really, I can't talk when I'm sneezing so all conversation needs to stop. I can't listen when I'm sneezing. I can't unpack boxes, put things away, drive safely, or sleep while I am sneezing. You can only imagine the sailor language in our bedroom when this insomniac is woken up sneezing!! So, emptying all the dusty boxes is quite the challenging mission since my allergies seem to be in full assault mode these days. The fun thing about unpacking things after a year is getting to see them again. Oh! I was wondering where those platters have been. Ooh! Look at all these picture albums. Wow! All my childhood schoolwork! Each box is like a little present and I need to stop (and sneeze) to look at each thing before finding the perfect spot for it. So, you can see how this would take some time.

Another project I completed is not as simple as it might seem. For some time I've wanted to decorate the boys' room and make it more personalized. I had bought unfinished wood letters to paint, but never took the time. Recently, it came to me that a couple bulletin boards for their art and school work would be perfect in there. My initial thought was cork boards, but pushpins would only turn into weapons in that room. When I saw magnetic boards and colorful magnets at IKEA, I realized that was perfect. So after painting the letters, I broke out the nails (several sizes), hammer, level, nail gun and air compressor, hooked that stuff all up myself, and voila!! Check out their room now! The valance and wall hanging are from their nursery bedding set, but I just love them anyway. Take a good look at the carpet, because anyone who comes to my house knows, it isn't often visible for all the toys!

So, as you can tell, I have been quite busy. Although I am actively job hunting, I am also enjoying this disguised blessing of being at home for a bit.

Beach Day

While I am off work, I am trying to spend Fridays taking the boys somewhere we wouldn't otherwise get to go. The interesting places are all jam packed on the weekends, so this is a nice opportunity to avoid the crowds. Today we went to the beach. We actually hit on a beach I haven't been to before, but will definitely be visiting again, possibly next week. It was really beautiful, but off the beaten path with limited parking, so not too crowded. The boys were fantastic the entire time we were there. I had the chance to praise them for bravery in the cold, cold water, teamwork, and overall good attitudes. Let me tell you, this has been infrequent as of late, and a refreshing reminder of easier times. After several months, it was easy to forget how much we all love beach days together.

Two cool dudes arriving at the beach with all their gear.










See that black speck? It's a dolphin! Although it's common for us to see dolphins swimming along the coastline, I have never seen them so close to shore (not that you can tell from this pic). The school would cruise back and forth and were quite playful. There were about three times I saw them actually flip their entire bodies completely out of the water doing a complete aerial somersault. Sensational. This was a highlight for me. Logan was kind enough to at least look. Hayden couldn't care less.










The difference between supervision and ......










...teamwork. What a nice change. Filling the bucket was a very big project. There was much conferring, waiting for waves, digging, and carrying. I'm still not sure what the ultimate goal was, but seems to me, it really didn't matter. It's all about the moment.










Looks almost like Baywatch, right?










Or James Bond?










Deep in conversation over dried apricots.

Navigating a murkey river of knowledge

Recently, I went to a seminar on how to navigate our school district. Being that it is massive, there is a lot to know! The lady giving the seminar actually gave new information for 3 hours, most of which focused on magnet schools, and how to earn points to get your child into the magnet schools. I was totally overwhelmed. Growing up where I did, it seems that my parents were fortunate (or wise to move there) to not have to deal with any of this. All the schools were good and still are. Not so much where I live now. There are certainly excellent schools, but we may not be zoned for one. Or, it might not be a primarily English speaking population. Or, one of the kids might need a magnet or gifted program, that isn't offered at our local school. Or.... the list goes on. I'm so glad I listened to this talk and now know what to ask and investigate. Because Hayden starts kindergarten in 2009, we will need to start this process this coming December!!

One good piece of advice that came out of all this is to keep him where he is at for kindy. It is a montessori program, and the boys are thriving. We love the school and the teachers, and at this point certainly feel it would be beneficial for Hayden to stay an extra year. He loves learning, asking for more academic work all the time. He has a lot of friends, and the school is a very nurturing environment, but with the well defined boundaries that my two little imps need. Seems I made a good choice to go the extra mile and try to sweeten up the teachers for Teacher Appreciation Week. Oh, and I told you they wouldn't be getting those red velvet black and white cookies. Those are already ancient history.

My Zen

One thing I tend to limit while I am working is my baking. It is something I love doing, especially with the boys. However, I normally do not have the time for gratuitous baking, nor do I want the added calories. Lately, for various reasons, we have been making many more treats.

We used fresh lemons from a generous neighbor to make lemon bars. Logan was in charge of the filling, while Hayden made the crumbly crust. As you can see by the picture, there were lemons and dry ingredients everywhere! Although they make a tremendous mess, it's worth the effort in the end. You can see by the picture that Hayden learned what sour means, while Logan was very busy in the background. They seem to really understand the process and enjoy the results.

For Shabbat dinner we made a chocolate and cheesecake swirled bundt cake, with M&M's of course. When it came to selecting a recipe, it was the picture of the cake with M&M's that sealed the deal. Since that particular recipe didn't look particularly fantastic, I selected a favorite swirled bundt cake of mine, adapted a chocolate glaze and let Picasso and Rembrandt add M&M's according to their own desgin. Because my bundt pan doesn't take a whole recipe, we used the overflow to make several mini-bundt cakes for the kids.

Last night, for Teacher Appreciation Week we made black and white red velvet cookies. This recipe was a bit more involved, and they seemed to lose interest when sifting the dry ingredients took too long. It was a bit tedious, but they came out so light and airy that I would do it again. The red food coloring added another element since two little

boys can make 1 tablespoon of red go a very long way. Somehow, I managed to contain the red to the baking area, while making dinner and getting Hayden to set the table. Since at one point he somehow got a huge blotch of red on his butt, he had to change his pants to avoid transferring it everything he sat on the rest of the evening, but that kid is super happy in sweatpants, so didn't mind at all. Once I finished glazing these, I thought they were so beautiful they needed to be photgraphed. Then, I had to taste one so I would know if they turned out ok. As much as I appreciate those teachers, these cookies aren't going anywhere!!! I guess we'll just have to make another sweet for school.

Sweet Freedom

So, despite the fact that I actually do need to work, I LOVE being home! I haven't had this much time off since the kids were born, and having a newborn is enjoyable, but no picnic. Now? I can have a picnic any day I want. This whole layoff thing? Pretty sweet deal in my book. Fridays now belong to me and the kids, as they go to school Mon-Thurs. My house is the cleanest it has ever been. I take long walks most days. We are eating like royalty as I love to cook, but rarely have time. The pile of boxes on the patio has even dwindled. After a couple "career advancement" seminars last week, this week I plan to start my job search in earnest. However, until I have to actually go to work, I am going to enjoy every second of this time off.

And the hits just keep on comin'

Last night as my boss and I were debriefing each other after Dancing With the Stars, Fillip called. I didn't answer figuring if he had an emergency, he would leave a message. Well, he did. While at his friend's house, somebody broke the windows on both sides of his cars! It's not even like his friend lives in a bad neighborhood, but I guess it's just as fun, if not more, to smash the windows of a strangers car in front of a beautiful house. By daylight today it looks like it was a bee bee gun. Whatever...that's a $500 deductible we didn't want to have to pay.

Oh, and on the job front...I didn't get lucky like last time.